I'll admit it, I had a "mommy meltdown" day yesterday. Feeling a lot of pressure about an approaching deadline and fearing I'd never get it done, combined with the constant fear of where to get my next job from, combined with a general worry about the economy and all of the negative aspects of that--let's just say that I created a recipe for disaster in my head! My dear mom was here as usual to help out so I could work and I just lost it, cried, vented, and yes even whined a little bit. It happens to the best of us! On a daily basis I am able to take a step back and realize just how lucky I am to be in this situation where I can be home with my darling little girl and still bring in some money....but sometimes my fear and anxiety get the better of me.
Then after a great pep talk, another supportive evening from my wonderful husband, and looking at Faith's sweet little face, I realized that I have nothing to complain about. Sure the deadlines will always be there, as will the anxiety about where the next batch of work will come from--it's the nature of the business! Just as every job has its' drawbacks, those are the major ones with this gig. So I realized I need to suck it up, quit whining, and realize daily just how very lucky I truly am! I have now instituted in conjunction with my dear husband a rule that each day we have to say one thing that we are grateful for. This helps us to stay grounded, keep perspective of what's important, and generally just love life more. So that's where I'm at today and feeling much more human. Hopefully that and the recent flow of work will continue, but hey one day at a time! I mean really, how could anyone get upset when they get to look at this sweet little face each and every day? I am truly one very very lucky woman and I know it and pray that it always continues!!
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